Malarbor says: Well, puny mortals, Malarbor has had a fine treat today. The first whole Voortrekker that I've had to devour in many a year. So long Paul Duit, as my roots burrowed into your flesh and rended you limb from limb, I felt as if our acquaintance was so fleeting that I hardly knew ye.

Talking to the Voortrekkers, did you know that the Kaiser's advisers, in a fit of demented generosity and a complete lack of strategic nous had offered to alienate the western portion of his patrimony to permit the recreation of a Batavian nation in the form of a condominium jointly administered with the Voortrekker government? Or that after twelve years (AN) of demonstrating good neighbourliness they would ceded the territory outright in return for scant territorial compensation in the lands stolen by the Voortrekkers from the Siyacha in central Benacia?

Happily for the Imperium, the insane generosity of the Imperial Advisory Council was matched only by the insane arrogance of the Voortrekkers presently ensconced in the Jing enclave of King's Worth. Where we saw prudent safeguards for the condominium, a joint garrison, a mechanism for arbitration, a pledge of good will, peaceful intent, and neutrality, they saw only unwarranted constraints upon their sovereignty. Rather than regain ancestral lands and their cultural patrimony, the Voortrekker community now proposes to uproot to the irradiated hell that is Eura.

Malarbor hopes that the Euran Death Worms enjoy their meals as much as he did.

On a partially related note, have you ever noticed how poultry farmers taste like chicken whilst cattle ranchers seldom taste of beef? Weird, huh?
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 Post subject: Malarbor Says
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2018 10:41 am 
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Joined: Sun May 10, 2015 8:28 pm
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It has been a great quandary, what to do with the Froyalanish pests who washed up on Elwynn's shores - unbidden - thirty-six years ago. How swiftly, in the name of diversity, they overturned and set at nought the ancient customs and proud traditions of the Elw. How readily they sought to divide the population and set communities against themselves, identifying no longer with the nation but with ever more reductive ethnic groups whilst these Storrish invaders heaped the spoils at their own tables, around which hangers-on from their wretched "High Realm" soon came to cluster. Quietly and patiently we endured the perversions of their religion, the abominations and presumptions of their propaganda, and the material and carnal greed of their so-called King.

Yet when we saw that the King was no longer content to confine his lusts to his own realm and had stretched forth his hand - and other appendages - to grasp blameless Mishalan, we felt obliged to act. Swiftly and decisively we did and to Uppland did Noah fly, to continue his peacock struttings and blatherings where they need not trouble us. Yet we were left with the question of what to do with the myriads of followers, who swarmed Benacia in preposterous numbers. Malarbor's suggestion of grinding their corpses into bonemeal was sadly ignored.

Happy then must the Froyalanish be to know that the prudent counsels of the Count Palatine of Kazan, our illustrious Steward, have prevailed. Instead of a wretched death at the hands of vengeful neighbours, the Froyalanish are being offered a chance to redeem themselves through meaningful work in the colonies thoughtfully ordained by her Serenity.


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How reassuring it must be for them to know - even as their lineages dilute and their male lines of descent are cut off at the root - that they and their descendants will spend the dwindling years remaining to them on this our Benacian homeland, in grateful service to the nations of our Imperial Republic whom they did once so grievously wrong.

_________________
  1. In Modan: Daniyal ibn Daniyal Simrani-Kalirion: Prince of the State of Modan. Palatine Legate of the Scholae Kalirion.
  2. In Elwynn: Liv Dravot: Imperial Mother, Arandur of the Southern League, Widow of the late Daniyal Sikander Dravot. Administrator of the estate of the late Thorgils Tarjeisson. Chairwoman of the ESB Group.

The Deceased

  1. Burgrave Waldemar Zinkgraven: Drowned in a Cask of Ale. (1660)
  2. Daniyal Dravot: intracerebral haemorrhage. (1657)
  3. The Kaiser Dominus: Ingested by a daemonic hellspawn from another dimension. (1644)


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