The Shirekeep Vindicator

The often renovated, and not infrequently burnt, Prefectoral complex in the capital city of Shirekeep. Charged with the thankless task of civic administration in the most malodorous and ungovernable city ever conceived.

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Jeremy H. Archer
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The Shirekeep Vindicator

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Jeremy Harwinsson Archer, Warden of the Imperial Constabulary and Captain of Investigations of the Shirekeep City Guard

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Jeremy H. Archer
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Archer's Sleuths Arrest Deviants

Post by Jeremy H. Archer »

Shirekeep, Old City - The briliant investigators at Shirekeep Yard today have made our beautiful city a little safer. After Zir Gloriosus the Steward, Lord Daniel Dravot, announced a decree that defines marriage and prohibits relationships between sentient species and humans, the brave soldiers of the city constructed a policy that was meant to target specific offenders. It is a public secret that in the dark alleys of the Old City, there are quarters in which degenerate humans enjoy relations of the flesh with unfortunate specimen of lesser species. These places of sin have been hubs of other kinds of criminal activity in the past, and as many as sixty-one murders can be directly traced back to these whorehouses.

But no longer. In the early morning, some twenty members of the Special Assignments Squad of the City Guard rounded up a large number of these perverts, and arrested them. Two pleasurehouses were subsequently burned to ashes. Unfortunately, the fire spread out across the street, which resulted in some collateral damage. In the end, forty-three men, two safir of unknown sex and one female cat were arrested and taken into custody at Shirekeep Yard.

Captain of Investigations, Jeremy Archer, called the operation a great succes. According to him, the operation was necessary to make a stand against the perversion of the Shirithian morality. Although he apologised for burning down the entire street, Archer was firm in defending the actions of his men, calling them "a strong sign of bravery in the sight of danger".

Once again the City Guard shows the people of Shirekeep its necessity. Without Archer's sleuths, we would be left to the whims of the evildoers that have infiltrated our city. We thank the Gods for the brave men who risk their lives to smoke these rats out of their filthy lairs.
Jeremy Harwinsson Archer, Warden of the Imperial Constabulary and Captain of Investigations of the Shirekeep City Guard

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Re: The Shirekeep Vindicator

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Shirekeep - Raynor's Keep: At least twelve people were killed overnight following looting and violence in Shireroth's capital, amid deepening unrest amongst the publicans of Shirekeep.

Most of the deaths occurred in the Immeritus Pleasure District located in the south-western corner of the city at a not far remove from the Froyalans Hertugshall, the John Metzler III University and the Diplomatic Quarter. Leaders of the Nationalist & Humanist Party say that the fatalities occurred when crowds departing from the Malak Stadium and Fighting Pit discovered that publicans in the adjacent bars were refusing to serve the 500 millitre Imperial Pint, which bar owners say is not a true Ric and represents a threat to their traditional livelihoods. A number of bars were ransacked and set alight with the fires subsequently taking hold and spreading to nearby licenced brothels and opium dens.

This morning has seen massive protests on Market Street in Shirekeep against the Stewardship of Altea Lomax by protesters infuriated by her perceived leniency towards publicans who sell short measure and who practice unlawful commerce. "Everything is mercy this and mercy that," said one protestor "it's pathetic, she should be drowned in one of those cesspits that she tried to write out of the law. All we want is proper justice, and proper justice is a proper scourging with none of this namby-pamby nonsense about the sanctity of human rights."

Barricades of burning tyres and refuse have been laid across the juncture of the Kaiser's Boulevard and the Nobles' Avenue. Scenes of disorder have been rife throughout the city with repetitive gunfire, street barricades set aflame and more than a dozen businesses looted. Amid the confusion, mothers and newborn children had to be evacuated from a maternity hospital named after the late Kaiser Dominus when it was swamped with tear gas.

Armoured vehicles from the Shirekeep Garrison have been observed moving towards Raynor's Keep and taking up positions in Raynertoo Park. At the moment their motives for deploying are unclear. Gravtanks have been observed hovering over both the protesters and Shirekeep Yard though as of yet, they have taken no action against either.

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Verion
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Case of Haraldian Possession briljantly solved

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Shirekeep, The Docklands - Yesterday night has seen another display of the ingenuity and brilliance of our esteemed City Guard. Captain of Investigations, Jeremy Archer and his sergeant Walter Stern had been called to the Docklands district of our capital, where they arrived at the Rotten Fish Inn, a slightly vulgar establishment. Upon entering the pub, the detectives encountered a horrific scene. The body of a man, later identified as Roger Pashtrin, the owner of the Rotten Fish Inn, was found mutilated on the pool table. His heart was ruptured with a cow's horn, which was stabbed into the body of the poor man. Quick reasoning and deductive quality lead Archer to trace the horn back to an antique shop one street from the inn. Here, an individual was taken into custody.

It later transpired that the murder weapon was part of a so-called Froyalanish helmet, which is associated with the Harald Entity. The antique store owner, who had recently changed his name to Halmjar Vanason, but was born Peter Evergreen, was identified as the perpetrator of the hideous crime. It was discovered that the man had come under the influence of the Harald Entity, that awful daemonic power which has terrorised our Elwynnese brethren for so long. Mister Evergreen had recently acquired the daemonic helmet and subsequently shown signs of mental retardation, which included displays of violence, walking around in the streets fully naked and exclaiming long, dreadful poetic works in public.

The City of Shirekeep may rest assured, knowing that Archer and the City Guard will keep us safe, but this incident should be a warning to all. The Harald Entity can have significant influence on poor and weak-minded individuals. It is a significant danger. On behalf of all our readers, the Vindicator fully supports the Imperial government and the current authorities in driving out the evil forcers from the once great State of Elwynn, and thanks them for their efforts.
1.Titus Morvayne, Prefect of Shirekeep, Count of the Skyla Islands
2.Eki Aholibamah Verion, Queen in the North
3. Ludovic Verion, Lord of Blackstone and Governor-General of the Iron Company
4. Jeremy Harwinsson Archer, super sleuth

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Re: The Shirekeep Vindicator

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Advert carried in the Vindicator on 18.XVIII.1659
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Re: The Shirekeep Vindicator

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Shirekeep, Old City - Extraordinary scenes in Shirekeep's Old City today as the General Post Office was occupied by a previously unknown group of militants.

It was a warm and brilliant Eljere morning in the capital on the 11th of Filadinu, and 'Keepers were strolling in the sunny weather, with a mind to avoid where the contents of the clogged gutters were spilling once more unto the streets flanking the Kaiser's Boulevard. In the Old City pedestrians sauntered contentedly, praising the City Prefecture for repairing the sewers so quickly after the Gevrader floods. Noble citizens and denizens of good standing were enjoying the fashionable shops and elegant hotels. The greatest city of the greatest empire was all contentment and ease.

Suddenly this tranquillity was shattered by the stomp of marching hobnail boots. To the consternation of onlookers, a motley half-maniple of sixty bedraggled curs, in uniforms made seemingly from off-cut Imperial green, wheeled onto the boulevard and went headlong in a brisk march towards the General Post Office.

These marchers appeared to be equipped with an unusual assortment of weapons and tools, including shotguns, ex-constabulary rifles, lead-tipped cudgels, picks, pikes, rusty shamshirs, crowbars, and Florian-Cocktails - the last being bottles filled with kerosene mixed with tar, with a tin can filled with black powder taped onto the bottom.

Upon arriving outside the General Post Office at around 9.15 in the morning, the assortment of men and women drew up short of the steps and appeared to hesitate. It required a stern-looking, rake thin and green-skirted, matron to walk to the head of the column and bellow loudly the order to 'Take the Post Office!' before the odd contingent of rebels attempted their move. These amateurs needed no further encouragement and stormed into the building, firing wildly into the ceiling. Customers and post officers, believing a robbery to be in process, fled, in some considerable alarm, back out onto the streets.

For half an hour the five-storey building had been ransacked and taken under "new ownership" as a sign cheekily hung from the barricaded main door proclaimed. In the subsequent hours windows have been smashed out and rifles have been reported as protruding from windows on the third and fourth floors.

Crowds, variously estimated as being between seven hundred and seven thousand depending on which authority is asked, have been observed milling around the temples of several denominations throughout the city, in a state of considerable agitation. Publicans, never popular in this city since the award of monopolies on the sale of alcohol and tobacco, have reported a spate of attacks on their premises. 'Keepers of the lower orders, never a group minded to let a good crisis go to waste, seem to have been taking the opportunity to break into and ransack commercial premises and the homes of social betters. Apprentices, who have made voluntary submission as Loyal Subjects to the various guilds and corporations of the city, have reportedly downed tools and embarked upon illegal strikes and shockingly immoral games of public football. In some areas looting has become wholesale, with department stores, jewellers, stores selling Hoennese electrical equipment, and perhaps surprisingly confectioners, being especially hard hit. Scenes of drunkenness and arson have been reported in the Entertainment District whilst urchins have been observed waving Slurpgurgle banners and letting off fireworks over on the rubbish heaps around the site of the city's former Froyalanish temple.

Cudgellers of the City Watch have been rousted from their leisurely routine to stand vigil over the various compounds and townhouses of the titled lords. Meanwhile the Watch's Special Assignments Squad is attempting to cordon off the occupied General Post Office, for the safety of the city's bemused citizenry, and also to isolate it from the disorders that have been seemingly stirred up amongst the lower classes. The Captain-General of the City Watch and the Lord Warden of the Imperial Constabulary have both reportedly been informed of the day's events and are said to be monitoring the situation closely.

Events meanwhile took a surreal turn at the General Post Office where a veritable posse of ladies of a certain age assembled in the building's magnificent portico, and read aloud a lengthy and strident proclamation which furiously denounced what they claimed was a "conspiracy against marriage" emanating from the Steward's Tower. The accusations levelled against Her Serenity the Count-Palatine are sufficiently and self-evidently ridiculous that this august publication will not trouble its readers by repeating them. The captors of the General Post Office have announced themselves to be the League for the Defence of Marriage and have claimed to be making a stand in order to uphold the traditional values of society.

The spokeswoman for this curious and deluded bunch has been identified as Lady Constance Booth, a spinster belonging to the landed gentry of Monty Crisco, previously noted for her attachment to Minarboreal spiritualism, amongst other disreputable fads. This paper does not propose to take lectures on marriage from a woman who has never known that blessed condition herself and invites its readers to do likewise.

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Re: The Shirekeep Vindicator

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24.X.1662, Shirekeep

A largely peaceful demonstration of around six thousand N&H/IRP supporters today marked the departure of Peter Nikolaevich Skuryov, Chief Resident of the Kalgachi den of spies in Shirekeep. Skuryov has been hastily recalled to the mountain lair of the arch-heretics after the de-facto sacking of diplomatic bungler-in-chief, Bitt Perkian Knotty, the bête noire of foreign ministries from Zalae to Raspur, who is presently reported to be the hostage of a malevolent - inevitably daemonic - entity ensconced in the dilapidated husk of Fort Ermingander. The Kalgachi schismatics, rather than endeavouring to secure his release, wrote selfaþ Knotty off as a bad investment and scarcely paused for breath before recalling their chief mischief-maker in Shirekeep home in order that he might, in their inverted system, plumb the depths of low office.

Good honest folk in Shirekeep will hardly be sorrowful to see the back of the pernicious ingrate Skuryov, whose pervasive network of corruption was nowhere more flagrantly demonstrated than in the utterly mysterious decision of Our Lord the Radiant Sun to elevate the blackguard as Baron Highbloom in the coronation honours. Our beloved Kaiser has, we must sorrowfully relate, always been rather susceptible, in spite of the best efforts of his courtiers, physicians, and dedicated caregivers, to a predilection for foreign novelties, whether in his toleration of Bovic heresies in his court or the frankly scandalous displays of sentiment following the Auspicious Occasion. We look to the gathering forces of renewal to rescue our sacred Kaiser from the limitations inherent in his flesh.

Skuryov is replaced by Ephraim Lymiron, the heresiarch hitherto responsible for the ongoing campaign of active measures carried out by the schismatic state in the capital of the Imperial Republic and scandalously tolerated under the present poisonous atmosphere of detente. We wish Aqa Lymiron all the best for the future and hope that he will experience no more of the misfortune that has seen him caught in traffic accidents on no less than four separate occasions and hospitalised with botulism after a rare night on the town.

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Modani corruption threatens Shirekeep

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Prefect's Keep - Prefect Titus Morvayne today expressed strong concerns surrounding the situation in Modan. The neigbouring Imperial State has recently been in the news as a result of the severe corruption within its government. The ties of the Prince of Modan to the ESB-group (responsible for countless deaths all over Micras) are undeniable. Morvayne, and other city officials, warned strongly against the undemocratic and corrupt climate that is already starting to be felt even within our ancient and proud city. To this day our great government has managed to keep the ESB-cronies out of the city by countering their presence in the docklands and ensure fair competition and private enterprise.

However, today the situation escalated, when the Modani government outlawed the Verionist Union. The VU is a distinct and historically significant party which may be held solely responsible for preventing the escalation of the Civil War in Elwynn. It also has brought many parts of the country, not in the least our great city, prosperity and peace. By banning this party, and by doing so casually equating the tireless crime-fighting government of Shirekeep to bandits and unsavoury groups, the government of Modan has shown its true colours. Had the Modani previously only tried to undermine the peace-loving people of Modan by economic supression, today it has decided to go full authoritarian. Of course this cannot be tolerated and this newspaper calls upon all who have family and friends in Modan to spread the word and encourage them to vote against the corrupt regime, and to bring democracy back for all people. Our Prefect is willing to take on this fight, and we should assist him!
1.Titus Morvayne, Prefect of Shirekeep, Count of the Skyla Islands
2.Eki Aholibamah Verion, Queen in the North
3. Ludovic Verion, Lord of Blackstone and Governor-General of the Iron Company
4. Jeremy Harwinsson Archer, super sleuth

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The Steward's Scandal - Read all about it!

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A sensational story today in the Vindicator, Shireroth's source for the truth. Today we publish a special edition, detailing our comprehensive investigation into the remarkable past of the current Steward, Hartmut Aldric. The position of Steward is one of the highest in the land and must be held by a person of great esteem and character. Certain facts have led us to believe that Hartmut Aldric does not have these qualities necessary for his position. In light of the upcoming election for the Folksraad, for which Aldric's Imperial Democrat Party currently leads the polls, we can no longer keep silent.

The involvement of Aldric with the Vanic traitors who governed our nation for some time has been troubled and murky at best. Where people like Ludovic Verion spoke out against the regime, Aldric expressed support at numerous occasions. Following the Auspicious Occasion, Aldric downplayed his involvement with the Vanics and managed to escape the purge. However, in an unprecedented publication, we now present to the public for the first time a harrowing fact: the relationship of the Steward and the Vanics was not only extensive, it was also deeply personal. Hartmut Aldric and disgraced Kaiser Hjalmar Redquil, also known as Audun Joel, were lovers!

The love story made in hell began at the inaugural ball of Noah, upon Noah's ascension to the countship of Elsenar in 1633. During this time, the Vanic fury was firmly in power. Audun Joel, son of Hallbjörn Haraldsson (Kaiser Hjalmar), was already groomed for high office. The Vanics had purged many good people from positions of power, and were about to stretch out their hairy, filthy claws across the entirety of Shireroth. It was here that the Steward and Audun Joel met. They quickly seemed to hit it off. An anonomous source claims: "they were in love, from the start. Aldric was totally smitten by AJ (Audun Joel, red), who was a beauty. I think that first night they even [expletive]. And they all loved Aldric too, he was at the court constantly".

Several sources claim that the relationship of Hartmut and Audun Joel lasted until Audun Joel's death, following the rightful purge of the unholy Vanic alliance. But the fact that Hartmut managed to keep his relationship relatively quiet to the world, he escaped the purge. Now, dear reader, we have before us a relationship that lasts almost 20 years! In these twenty years, the Vanics, and this includes Audun Joel himself, who accended to the throne in 1639, did terrible things to our country. Brave souls, such as the Verionists, who spoke out were banned by this daemonic Kaiser. According to a woman who served as servant to the Vanics (and was molested on a daily basis by those perverted heathens), "they were two peas in a pot, where the Kaiser was, there was Hartmut and the other way around. I think he influenced the Kaiser, they were pretty much ruling together".

How can we, free citizens of the Imperial Republic, support a man who shows such a lack of character and who was not only condoning, but complicit in the rape of our nation? The answer is simple, we cannot. An appeal must be made to those who govern us. Sack the Steward, save the nation!

Support our hard-fought liberation from Vanic oppression, support those who stood against Storish insurgence from the start, and punish the enablers, the conspirators and all who brought the wickedness of perversion into our lands! Fight with your voice, fight with your vote but fight together the good fight!
1.Titus Morvayne, Prefect of Shirekeep, Count of the Skyla Islands
2.Eki Aholibamah Verion, Queen in the North
3. Ludovic Verion, Lord of Blackstone and Governor-General of the Iron Company
4. Jeremy Harwinsson Archer, super sleuth

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Re: The Shirekeep Vindicator

Post by Continuator »

Letters to the Editor:
Bastian Kremetz wrote:Sir, - Even after my time as an IRP assemblyman on the governing body of our good city, your paper has remained something of a guilty pleasure of mine but I must make exception to yesterday's edition. Although Hjalmar Redquil was cursed with Froyalanish heritage, there was never any documentary evidence of his participation in Vanic debaucheries. As Kaiser Hjalmar Redquil averted the danger of a perpetual Froyalanish reign over our Imperial Republic by appointing a Norseman, Thorgils Tarjeisson, as his successor, and after the latter's martyrdom the throne passed to Kaiseress Noor, ushering in the blessed age of the Kalirion Supremacy. You might even say that Hjalmar Redquil, if he did not dismantle it, was at least responsible for arresting the spread of the daemonic vanic state and reversing its insidious infiltration of Raynor's Keep and the city.

Let us not forget that even after his reign the late Kaiser continued to serve as a benefactor to the city, as its prefect, improving the roads, and helping to bring an end to the chronic flooding and the backing up of the clogged sewers of the old city. We look forward to the day when the present incumbent achieves anything so beneficial to the good of the people. I hope that the IDP, when it comes to power, will continue the good work of Hjalmar Redquil and Mira Octavius in reforming this great city of ours into some place more liveable for our descendants.

As to the substance of the relationship between the present Steward and the late Kaiser, some may find their relationship distasteful, even sordid, but I gather that such things are legally permitted to the nobility, so it is not really our place to quibble.

Your's Respectfully,

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