Geopolitical Analysis 2006

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Aster
Posts: 391
Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 4:32 pm

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Aster »

That may well be true, Ardy, but just *perhaps* some of the 'attitude' here doesn't convince them to reconsider either ;)

Admittedly though, it's quite a niche hobby, but even by internal standards, it's in a very bad way. There's just no new blood.

(FYI, I seem to remember that the 'Polyp' thing was Leon's idea)
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Hesam Jayatar
Posts: 593
Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2011 1:28 am

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Hesam Jayatar »

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What none of you know is that Bastion is controlled by Space Lizards. Since he both hates Babkha and secretly has a crush on us, I know Aster suspected space lizards all along. His observational skills are second to none, and yes, it was space lizards who tried to move the MCS to Bastion. It was Space Lizards who direct Babkha in hundreds of secret forums all dedicated to analysing every aspect of Ashkanzata, and it's Space Lizards who allow Babkha and the Bastion admin to join forces against them. Even though objective observation would indicate that Ashkenatza only ever seems to come up in conversation when Aster brings it up. And since no one visits Ashkenatza, I would imagine that it's untouched by the Space Lizards... for now... Gilles' unique ability to connect facts that are separated by an air gap, has led him to the same conclusion. It was the Treesian Space Lizards who brought us the technological advancements Babkha needed to build our mighty empire at present. It was the Treesian Space Lizards who told us that only by giving away our land on two separate occasions would we gain the Empire we seek. That only by completely ignoring everyone outside of Bastion (and many within Bastion) would we be able to gain the coveted title we've been after since day one:

Lord of Paranoid Nerds.

Yes, our aim has been the secret crown all along. We've coveted the title Lord of Paranoid Nerds for ages, but we've finally been discovered. The Space Lizards taught us to time travel to the past with Gilles' glorious observations, to tell our past-selves to continue doing what they were already doing. The space lizards showed us that in a forum-based hobby of twenty people, where almost no one gets along, and everyone is pedantic enough to correct the spelling errors of a suicide note, only in a hobby where it would literally be impossible to build an empire unless the participants were willing, only in such a hobby could Babkha expand. So we convinced willing people to take up citizenship in Babkha and drove them away from our rivals. You can ask Wythe, I cunningly tricked him into joining Babkha by repeatedly warning him against it, suggesting that most people find it offensive and that it's probably not a good representation of the hobby anyway. That despite these warnings he's stayed and seems to enjoy it. Or Conglacio who also experienced a very similar converstion. Or Zand who was kidnapped from Ashkenaza in the dead of night and forced to swear fealty to the Shah. In fact, any Babkhan who holds or has held a second citizenship in another state is consistently forced to swear fealty to Babkha. Since Ardy, Ric, Farzan and myself have held foreign citizenships, we will never rise to the rank of Shah, (despite all of us being Shah on repeat occasions in some cases). Ardy and Ric's present here in Shireroth is only a cunning ruse. Ric was meant to lie in wait until he was made Kaiser again, at which time he'd snatch the power of shireroth and give it to Babkha (even though we've proven that it's impossible to enforce).

Of course our power is faltering. Even now, Edgard has become an Antican, which is obviously a powerplay to direct Antica from the shadows. Since its widely known that both Antica and EAH are puppet states of Babkha, since if a Babkhan talks to anyone outside of Babkha, those people are now Babkhan subjects. Fortunately, our Space Lizard overlords have supplied us with a cunning plan to counter Edgard's move into our Antican colony. It's as cryptic and mysterious as all of our most cunning plans. In order for us to regain complete control over Antica, we have to continue to not interfere with Antica. Brilliant isn't it? They'll never see it coming!

In summation, Treesian Space Lizards are the premier force in our hobby.

Aster
Posts: 391
Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 4:32 pm

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Aster »

lol internet.
And since no one visits Ashkenatza
It's really a mark of immense arrogance to believe that people who aren't from Bastion origins who continually visit Ashkenatza count as 'no-one' in your mind.
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Hesam Jayatar
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Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2011 1:28 am

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Hesam Jayatar »

the point is you try, and I think that's great.

Aster
Posts: 391
Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 4:32 pm

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Aster »

Nice to see the Vêzârât ê Hûbrîs is out in full force today.
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Mordechai B.E.

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Mordechai B.E. »

Aster wrote:That may well be true, Ardy, but just *perhaps* some of the 'attitude' here doesn't convince them to reconsider either ;)

Admittedly though, it's quite a niche hobby, but even by internal standards, it's in a very bad way. There's just no new blood.

(FYI, I seem to remember that the 'Polyp' thing was Leon's idea)
Batavia has 2 people active now who were not active in the Dutch sector in 2011. Antica has Artz and KaICho, who were not active in the English sector in 2011 as far as I know. So that's at least four new people on the Bastion, no new blood? Well, if you make it impossible for people to create accounts that is the only realistic result.

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Maximos
Posts: 158
Joined: Mon Feb 21, 2011 1:51 am

Re: Geopolitical Analysis 2006

Post by Maximos »

Space lizards must be controlling Ashkenatza given how long we've been waiting to get forum registration back up and working properly. It's in their hands...

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